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Custody & Visitation questions and answers

• I need advice on getting some type of legal rights and custody over my non-biological son

  Asked in New York, NY | December 21, 2025

  I was in a same-sex relationship with my x for over 10 years 2012-2022/23. She got pregnant. we had the baby in 2019, the hospital wouldn't let me put my name on birth certificate bc they said we didn't use a donor, so the father had rights and we weren't married. they refused to put me on birth certificate. so as of now by law I'm nothing to him. and she goes back and forth not letting me see him. i fully supported both of them, was the only one working from before he was born until we broke up in 22/23. I do have my name on his christening paperwork from the church, I'm on all his medical and school paperwork as the parent, i have tax paperwork claimed as my kid, plus a ton of pictures from throughout the years, friends and family who can all support that. He calls me mom that's all he ever known me as. now as of now she won't let me see him. I need help getting rights and custody.

  Answered by 1 attorney

  

• Never married, separated, one child age 4. Mother withholds child visitation at will. Falsely accuses father of abuse. What do I do?

  Asked in Monterey, CA | July 6, 2026

  Separated as partners 3 years ago. She states she is "afraid" of me (I have never abused her in any way). She makes up stories and has called the police twice. She disapproved of an activity I took my son to, and screamed at me about it in front of the child (and my mother). Then excluded me, my family, and my friends from the child's birthday party, and said if we came she would call the police. There is no custody order at this time, and never any restraining orders or arrests against me after police investigated her claims. I would like 50% custody but I'm afraid court might believe her lies.

  Answered by 1 attorney